Please, all gods of virtue and goodness, help me from being an old, washed up cranky arse today!
It's been a full 4 weeks since I've been back to work from maternity leave, and while it's been quite smooth, I think it's caught up to me. I'm TIRED! We're not talking need-a-nap-today-to-cure-it tired. We're talking full on coffee-is-not-enough, my-legs-hurt, f-you-headache-that-won't-go-away, if-you-wake-one-more-time-child-I'll... TIRED!
It's presently 6:52am. Because my dear son (DS) decided that 11:27pm was his mini-morning last night, I only got to sleep at around.... oh... 1:20am. So, with the 5:57am wake time, that's... well, if you're well-rested enough, you can do the math! Seriously, the only other time I remember being this tired was when DS was about 6 weeks old and started to pull all nighters. I'm functioning, as I was then, on some warped, out-of-date, really pissed off version of autopilot! :(
With this lack of sleep, or just plain tiredness (because I believe there's a difference), my "dragoness" alter ego rears it's ugly head. (It's truly ugly!) Amid life, I'm still trying to tea party with the daughter, smile, be happy-you-can-count-on-me teacher lady, and (cough) keep my husband from finding other extracurricular partners (cough, cough).
So to my immediate surrounding posse, I say:
- I'm sorry I'm snapping at you.
- No, DD, I'm not mad at you, that look is just a semi-permanent grimace of sleep angst.
- Mother, go pound sand. I don't care how you, or your mother, or anyone else you hold in high esteem coped 'way back then' with 17 kids, minimal ammenities, and farm animals.
- DS, please get over this cold and return to your regularly scheduled sleeping program, which wasn't great, but I'd really appreciate a long series of re-runs right about now!
- Honey, keep close to the palm sisters for a while longer.
That mother of the year award, you can stick it!
the tired me